Thursday, October 15, 2009

A Bit Worried

Getting a bit worried about all this memory lose and slurring of words (left side "droopy"). It's not just me, Neil, my best friend N, mom, dad, even the kids ask why my words are slurred (not like that but still). With all my migraines, memory loss, slurring of words, ,and droopy face, I"m getting seriously worried. Talked to Dr. G but he played it off as depression and not paying attention.

Job hunting on top of this whole settlement thing has got me seriously stressed out. Not to mention MONEY! The constant/daily pain (back/leg) on top of migraines and memory loss things have really got me worried. ON top of all this no one wants to hire me! I've applied at so many different places and have been rejected by all of them! I don't think I should even get a job till this whole fucking settlement is over! (less stress maybe?)

This is just almost too much for me to handle. If I didn't have my soul-mate/life partner to lean on for this I know I would have gone insane.

Plus on all top this is dad constantly nagging me about my weight saying that's why I'm not getting hired! His daughter is sickly skin and bones! A pot smocking, drug junky that is taking advantage of her family (mom & dad), well I guess that includes us too!... HA! I may love her because she's family but we certainly do not like her. I try so fucking hard everyday to hold my tong and be nice/polite as I can be but she still manages to do such petty things to me in return! For example: She's turning dad agents me. Yes you read right. This man who I look up to as my second father said to someone on the phone, introducing me as his wife's daughter and that was ... something (forgot) and that HIS daughter is doing so great. It seems that I am no longer his step-daughter but just a less of a side note "wife's daughter."

UGH!!

No wonder I can't find a job?

Please there are NO jobs out there even the unemployment people said that they can't help me.

Please god, please, if it is right let the settlement end in our favor quickly so our money woes will help lesson our sorrows/issues, so that we can more on in a more positive way.
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